Conserves Chtoura: RABB el banadoura!

Straight from the hot oven comes this gem from Allied Advertising!.... Copy/Paste!... Oh my God, indeed, Rabb el banadoura (rather than rebb!!!). I might be bad at doing banner, be the worst copywriter in town (according to Yves Farhat), but damn me for falling in love with this one!

The Matchbox banner

Lately, a reader complained about the "Gandour Lucky Biscuit" banner on top of the blog calling it "ugly". So I decided to replace it by another (even uglier one) just to prove that I take my critics seriously. That person did post "anonymously" but frankly how many people can couple this much arrogance with this much ignorance and use a** as every third word in their speech? Only one that I know of....

Myriam Achkar: The unofficial account of the Marwan Charbel words

If I am blogging on Myriam Achkar's more than tragic death it is because it has been reported to me that the original - uncut - words of of our Minister of Interior Marwan Charbel were not "this crime should be swiftly punished so as for people not to perpetrate it again" but also "the people (of Sahel Alma) should punish him themselves" (apparently this was mentionned in night and then morning editions of radio news and then disappeared off the airwaves). This brings back to mind the murder which occured in Ketermeya where a murder has brought about the lynching and brutal killing of the supposed perpetrator.
If our Minister of the Interior is telling us to take the law into our own hand, then we seem to have a major problem - either with the law, or with the minister's conception of the said law.

Toom Extra launching: Dare you kiss me after this?

Toom Extra will be signing their book live in the flesh (it is reported Rana will be wearing the Versace for H&M dress she got off the mannequin from the ABC flagship store) - as for Tony and Samah they are so busy giving "missed calls" in coded signals I am not sure if they will make it on time.... The buffet to be offered includes Taouk sandwiches with - you guessed it - toom extra and also "fake" tarboush cookies straight from Switzerland....
The event will take place on the 1st of December at the Metro Medina at 7:30 (right next to Masrah al Madina in Hamra - two flights down).

Dutch shorts and animations screening at Saifi Urban Gardens

You still have the chance to attend tonight!!!.... The Dutch screening of shorts and animations is taking place at Saifi Urban Gardens behind the Coral Station and the Lounge restaurant right at the beginning of the road leading you to Gemmayze (i.e. one street below it). The guys as the (soon to be established) Dutch Institute in Beirut (hello Taco and Michael) did a fantastic job selecting shorts and animations that do not need any dubbing or translation (all of them were based on music).
The total effect is charming, witty, eccentric - and frankly reminds me of Dutch people as all these qualities actually apply to them! - and some pieces still linger in the memory way after leaving the projection (I am thinking specifically of the touching existential "Dilemma" by Boris Paval Conen  and Børge Ring's  majestic "Anna & Bella" which won the academy award of 1985 for Best Short Animated Film).
So hurry up to get your piece of the action. Admission is free!

It's a good one - I swear it!

I was enamoured by this ad. And for those of you who always accuse me of personal vandettas, I say it is done by Clementine, which means that I am not ashamed of saying a good ad is one when I see it. And this one is damn good! Actually, it is simply the first words of the military oath "I swear by the all-mighty God (to achieve my fullest performance to saveguard the flag of my country and in defence of my nation - Lebanon)." It is unsigned but it doesn't take a genius to figure out it is the army because of the backdrop cloth, and it is so eye-catchy due to the displaced typo which seems to invade the next panel giving it an air of mobility and suggesting there is a continuation for the words... Well done - now if only our independance was just as good!

C('est) F(ou)!

Photo credit: Abir Ghattas
I may be a little early for my taste to already hit the Christmas market, but what the heck, brands are brands and soon the Easter bunny will be popping right after Santa Claus, which brings us to this early revelation by C&F and there very cute "Jingle Belle" (It sure beats the stolen "love yourself" ad or the confusing "little girl" foray)...

Abdécation, of journeys not taken.

“But the love will have been enough; all those impulses of love will return to the love that made them. Even memory is not necessary for love. There is a land of the living and a land of the dead, and the bridge is love, the only survival, the only meaning.” The Bridge of San Luis Rey – Thornton Wilder

Archewallogy from New York - guest post from Diane Chehab.

From "Our (wo)man in New York" - Diane Chehab:
Recently I was visiting PS 1, an offshoot of MoMA in Long Island City, with a Japanese friend to see Bibi Seck’s furniture in the cafeteria.

On our way out, I realized that we were close to a building I always notice from the No. 7 train, on my way to Flushing Meadows Park in Queens. I had never seen it up close; it was no disappointment. I immediately thought of the “Lord of Graffiti”—Tarek Chemaly, of Beirut NTSC. He kindly offered that I post some photos on his blog, as a guest blogger.
A recent article in the NY Times stated that the building, named 5Pointz Art Center, may be demolished in the near future to make way for a new building; in this case, it will be the end of the revolving graffiti art exhibit. Especially in New York City, nothing lasts forever; it is an ever-evolving city, and these past years, ever more empty or derelict areas are being filled with new apartment buildings.
In the meantime, however, the building is still one giant exterior two-dimensional art space, where you can watch the artists either modify their work, or create a new “masterpiece.”

Benetton goes back to Oliviero Toscani legacy

The latest campaign from Benetton after many lackluster years following the tumultuous departure of creative maverick Oliviero Toscani sees them going back to his legacy of provocation in visuals depicting world leaders kissing each other on the mouth. Everyone who is anyone in the global political scene is there. After many years of uncreative ads it was about time they went back to their pot-stirring sauce, already they had the biggest stamd of (dis)approval ever: The Vatican judged the campaign "unacceptable" - which should make more palatable to many people!

USEK students shine in celebrating Football win!

 

After the disappointment of the Almaza ad, I gave my students in Esquisse II the challenge - to pick a brand that might be compatible with football (either in terms of eating it during the match, or related to sports at large)... And by God they shone!... From top we have Elyse Tabet who picked Middle East Airlines "bidding farewell to the Koerans", then Jessica Yaghi goes to Gilette with "we gave them a close shave", only to be followed by Yara Boulos claiming "2 are better than 1, we've got balls". Nathalie Alam chose Kleenex, "for tears of joy and sadness" (thankfully, the sadness was the Koreans). Rachelle Awad delivers a major punch, she tackles Nescafe with "the sweetest 2 in 1 ever"!!!....
So tell me guys, with such ads from people still not professionals, don't you think ad agencies ought to be ashamed for the rubbish they are launching in the market?

Reporting live from the Versace x H&M war zone!

" Looks like Beirut!" (sorry Jad - I did this on purpose). So today, like any respectable reporter, I was where the action is - the real place where a war was raged, victims were being walked over in neglect, where tears where being shed... In short, I was at the Versace x H&M collection opening in their Kaslik store. And it was a riot in Kaslik, I can only imagine what it was like in the downtown and ABC mall flagships stores.
Whereas scheduled to open at 8, the opening was delayed till 9 a.m. by then I was worth it to see the Lebanese fashionistas barely awake, not having time for a full-make up (even if some of them were dressed to the ninth whereas others were in tracksuits).
As the clock approached the H-hour the tension was so palapable you could have cut it with a ribbon. Now, whereas Versace does rhyme with trash, I am not sure a "zalghouta" was in the order of the day as the staff counted down till the doors opened. It was really misplaced and the audience outside, gloomy and worried about being able to grab what they came for decidedly did not join the fray.
Mind you the H&M people even had a carpet with velvet ropes and all the she bang. The shop assistants were dressed in specially-made t-shirts for the events which I am sure will pop up on ebay even as I write this. Seeing the merchandise up close and personal though left me ambivalent, the shirts' tailoring (even for my untrained eye) seemed awkward but seeing the shop manager dressed in that killer tuxedo jacket made me drool (pity I did not need one because the cut and the finishing were practically impeccable!).
Yes, and luckily I was a man... The competition in the women's department - or rather the women's section was unbearable. It was a frenzy! Before going in a woman next to me had a shopping list of no less than 30 items with a different woman's name next to each one and a different size - she was basically shopping for a whole social club. But good luck to her! Because women were simply clutching at everything they can get their hands on, including men's clothing - because it also seemed they were shopping for their husbands (I do doubt though that I am going to be seeing anyone wearing the full cerise suit or the op-art influenced ensemble).
Some women seemed to be carrying tonnes and tonnes of material, with no drivers parked outside it was a mystery for me how the loot was going to be carried back home - or to work even as it was pre-office opening hours. At 9:15 there was virtually nothing left on the racks. As a matter of fact, oddly, some women were even already looking at the H&M classic collection mistaking it for a Versace product (how the mistake happened is beyond me though as the collaboration designs are too flashy to be mistaken for anything else!).
And so there.. Now, in case you are wondering what I bought myself, all I can answer is what women tell me on dates when I speculate about being intimate "that's for me to know and for you to find out"... (Oh, and I was the first person to go to the cashier, because it helps to know what you wanted in advance from the collection!)

Almaza - sorry, I spoke too fast.

Research credit: Miled Issa
Ah! Sorry, I spoke too fast yesterday about the potential return to form of Almaza... So Lebanon won over South Korea 2-1 yesterday (sorry, I was about to do the same blunder as Sarah Palin quoting the North Korean allies), whereas the reply of Almaza was swift over facebook, it had an uncanny air of resemblance to the original world cup ad they launched. So, if you get "inspired" by your own archives (to quote Impact BBDO) - is this theft? And well, honestly now, why bother do a new ad when an old one would do!

Dar Onboz and Farida at Tawlet restaurant.

For me it is simple, if Dan Onboz and Michele Standjofski are in it, then it is worth attending. Mark your calenders for that Dar Onboz day at Tawlet in Mar Mikhael.

The 3(stoo)G(es)

So we are in the my-speed-is-bigger-than-yours territory... MTC is saying that 3G is "so last week" (if this is the case, I completely missed it!) and that "one speed differs from another", Alfa speak of nothing slowing you down (this indeed, remains to be seen), and Sodetel? Well, I am not sure what they are advertising to be honest. The fastest internet? That's for dial phone I presume (2MB for 29.95 a month). Besides, how can the claim "those days are over" (the days of slow loading of the net) be over when - officially - they never existed? You see, even if the darkest days of the slow internet, all companies kept insisting on speed, customer satisfaction, and what-not in their ads. Suddenly, they admit that they were getting it wrong?

Versace x H&M

Whereas Beirut/NTSC rarely speaks of fashion, as of late it became unescapable not to feel the buzz of the Versace x H&M collaboration which will be released on November 17th in 300 stores worldwide, three of which are in Lebanon (which should tell you how much fashion-conscious we are). Naturally, the collection is not for everyone - since the collaboration revisists some of the bold prints from the Gianni Versace era of the house. These days only lady Gaga can sport a vintage Versace ensemble without causing eyebrows to lift... And yet, to think that this was the standard back in the late 80s and early 90s!... So on your marks, get set.. Go hysteric!

Exotica gets strange indeed.

I know we are already past Halloween and we still have "St. Barbara" to come (even if I have previously indicated that the two get confused in Lebanon) so I am reviewing these Exotica ads belatedly. The idea could be nice, to offer someone you love a "dead moss" bouquet... Or maybe to offer it to someone you do NOT love? If this is stunt that originated from the client's marketing department or from Leo Burnett I am unsure, but it does see Exotica delving into uncharted territory.
And this is a freebie for the people who like this blog, this operation reminds me of the "mother in law" Swatch which was released in tandem with the Mothers' day special in 1998 (called the rose). Picture below:

The melting pot this week

photo credit for Kafa: Beirut Drive by Shooting

The Achrafieh 442 ad was placed in the garage of ABC Sassine... "why drive to ABC when you can walk?" at first I thought it was a campaign to decrease traffic. But well, if the purpose of advertising is "to make you look" then it did! And the place where the ad was put was perfect I admit.
Beirut/NTSC pronounced a moratorium on Almaza ads long ago, but either this a return to form or a stray bullet - the tipped Almaza bottles are in the shape of the Jeita grotto stalactites. The grotto did lose in the scam competition. And hey, it beats being "inspired" by other people to do your ads!
Kafa NGO are back in the game deploring that rape is a crime no matter who the perpetrator is (i.e. even if a member of the family). In a country where we still have honor crimes, I doubt anyone will take seriously the notion of a husband forcing himself upon his wife.
City furniture commit the blunder of the season. How come this supposedly warm-colored ad does not inspire the conviviality it ought to exude? Simple - it's plain silly (and that nonesense copy of falling into her arms because it's the "fall season!).
I admit, I am a pervert and have a one-tracked mind but everytime I saw the Oreo ad I thought of sex. I think the combination of the words twist-lick-dunk in that succession just made it unescapable for me. I might be wrong, but then I shall tell you after my meeting with Dr. Freud what it all means.
And last but not least, an honest, legally bullet-proof ad from Niquitin. What I like about this is that there is no lying. There is the "results may vary" disclaimer in small print at the bottom, it offers hope but also "use as directed" notice, and frankly tries to balance between promising and keeping its feet to the ground.

Laziz gets the Rana Salam touch

Photo credit: Rana Salam
So it was bound to happen! Laziz in Hamra gets rebranded with the use of the Rana Salam touch. Sadly have not seen the revamped version yet, but if Rana's earlier works are anything to go by (and the above photo is any indication) the result is a pure stunner! Well done.

The twittereddine el Qassam brigades - a 140 characters or less attack.

Original artwork by Tarek Chemaly

Frankly, if it wasn't for Maya pushing me to write something I wouldn't have - so without any political puns - la3younik!.... For a complete list of the politicians using twitter (or having twitter used on their behalf by tech-savvy consultants/assistants) please refer to the complete list on Mustafa's Beirut Spring.
It seems - up until recently - twitter was a person's safe haven from political bombardment, according to Mustafa only very few of those actually engage in dialogues while others still resort to the usual top-down communication mechanism. Whereas this seems as an oddity in an age where everyone is challenging the authority of traditional media and one-way-street communication, looking a bit down leads us to conclude that whereas the means of communication has changed - the technique from both emitter and receiver is still the same.
It might seem shocking for you to learn that people still like to be told what to do - without much argument or fuss. Still like to be in the "entourage" - virtual or real - of politicians and in case you think I am exaggerating think of the famous kiss Ammar el Houri planted on Saad Hariri's hand after his speech in Martyrs' square!
Naturally, how much the Amchit residents are influenced by president Suleiman's tweets, or if the hardcore Future movement members in Akkar and the deep Bequa'a give a toss is Ayman Hariri got himself a T90 (a tweet straight from Saad) remains to be seen.
So now social media, in all its forms, has been highjacked by politicians who most likely do not know how to operate a computer. Or if they do like Mohammad Rahal only use it to play minesweeper during boring cabinet sessions.

Photo credit Al Balad newspaper

Great, now you have been warned. The next twittereddine el Qassam attack will happen in 140 characters or less in an account near you!

Beirut/NTSC is the invitee blog of Agenda Culturel for the week

The original article can be read here.... Nice to know that some people seem to appreciate!... Thank you Raghida for your kind efforts!

Thank you Mr. BBDO

A Tarek Chemaly original painting "inspired" by Pablo Picasso

For the last week or so I have been offline for personal reasons, and I come back to find that I have opened a can of worms regarding the Geita grotto ad. They say "imitation is the sincerest form of flattery" which means that somewhere, an aging director called Steven Spilberg, is smiling appreciatively, and is being comforted from the mediocre reviews his Tintin movie just generated. In addition, a French saying goes "une faute avouee est a demi parodnnee" (an admitted mistake is half forgiven) and it seems in the lexicon of ImpactBBDO (or is it Impact BBDO?) it is full - not just half - forgiven: In order not to appear as a thief, all you have to do is admit the theft and call it inspiration.

This post is being written several days after I received a call from BBDO regarding the post, so it is neither impulsive, nor hormonal. I have had time to mull things over in my head, and I am sticking to my guns and remain unappologetic.

One last reference comes to mind, it is that of actress Candice Bergen who portrayed journalist Murphy Brown in the famous television series, when she became a single-mother in the show, American Vice President Dan Quayle openly criticized her for this in 1992, so when in August that same year she got an Emmy award for her role, she said "thank you Mr. Vice President."
For stirring the controversy, for driving the readership of my blog sky high, and for opening the debate about theft/inspiration, I say: "Thank you Mr. BBDO."

PS: MORRON is actually spelled MORON with one R (this is a reference to one of the comments posted "anonymously" on the previous post.)

ImpactDDBO steals Geita ad

Compare and contrast the above. Now contrast and compare. Now comp.... I give up! I give up!
Must we ALWAYS steal? Is this the answer to everything? ImpactBBDO has been caught red-handed just like many, many of our supposedly top agencies... Under the idea that "everyone else is doing it so can't we?" we are further dumbing down the standard of our morals, ethics (look up those words in case you don't know what they mean), and dignity (again, google it for definition).... So once more, a thief has been caught, no wonder ImpactBBDO is sponsoring "La nuit des Publivores" can you imagine how many of those 500 new ads they can steal? It would last them a full year of pseudo-creativity!

A case of mistaken identity

I was devastated when I saw this Kool cigarettes ad.... As if someone was robbing me of my memories. My landmarks. My references. Like every other Lebanese person of my generation I grew up to the "Lucky Strike man" with that unforgattable copywriting in the ad "mountalek, moudrikoun darikahou, wathinkon min mafsih" (a go-getter, self-assured, confident of his path) only to discover that it was not the Lucky Strike man at all, he was just an imposter... He was the Kool man. And so there, nothing is for real!